Back of the Back of the Head

Third Time's the Charm
I was at Fenway Park on Sunday and got really hungry after the first inning, so I went down to get a sausage. The first sausage stand didn't have any ready. I walked to the one fifty feet away and they had sausages but no peppers and onions. I got really angry and told them they should start cooking before the game starts. The third sausage stand had both, so I got one there. It wasn't as crispy as I like them.

Critical Condition
We have an air conditioner in our living room, but not in our bedroom. At night we close the bedroom door, open the window, and turn the fan on. I think that just makes it a lot hotter than if we just closed the door and kept the window shut. But we haven't tested it out yet because my wife likes the window open at night. I suppose if we kept the door open and the air conditioner on that would work pretty well, but we haven't tried that either.

John = 1, Fly = 0
There was a fly in my house. Big one. Eventually it flew in my bathroom and I locked myself in there with it. I wasn't fast enough to swat it, so I came up with the idea to spray Windex at it as it flew by. It dropped right to the ground, poisoned. Then it went bye bye down the toilet.

Escalading Tensions
I was walking down Boylston Street today and saw a big, shiny, red, new Cadillac Escalade rolling down the street. I immediately wondered, "Drugs or sports?" The driver was Manny Ramirez, so the answer is the latter. If it were Gary Sheffield, I suppose you could argue for both.

Mucha Lucha
I was watching some lucha libre wrestling over the weekend. It airs 3-5 on Saturdays on Galavision. My favorite matches are the ones from CMLL where every wrestler comes to the ring hand in hand with a girl in boots, hot pants, and a bikini top. It doesn't matter if they're a technico or rudo, nor does it seem to matter which girl they come out with, since they just use the same four over and over. But two of them are really hot and they all have really nice bodies.

Big Hurt
We saw two time American League MVP Frank Thomas shopping with his wife at Caesar's Palace in Las Vegas. He was on crutches from his October ankle surgery. She was a tall, hot blonde. He was also wearing a wireless cell phone headset.

Sean McDonough
I went out for Mexican food a few months ago and I thought I saw Sean McDonough eating across the room from me. I looked again and it turns out it was him. I still wasn't completely sure, but then I heard him asking for another beer, and I knew it was him. Then I finished my burrito, paid, and left.

Late Fees
I went to the library to pay a 20 cent fine. When I got there, they said my fine was $1. I complained about it, and they took off the extra 80 cents.

Oysters
A few weeks ago, I found myself working in the North End for the day. At lunch, I wandered over to Quincy Market and decided on lunch at the legendary Union Oyster House. I pulled up at seat at the oyster bar and ordered half a dozen oysters from the friendly oyster shucker. They were pretty good.

The Public Library's Facilities
The restrooms at the Boston Public Library are smelly and horrible. I mentioned this to my friend Jodi, who told me to come with her. She ushered me through a security door into the hidden employee area, with cleaner rest rooms and a large lounge with vending machines. I'll use the men's room here from now on.