There Can Be Only One

November 17, 2012

Yesterday, at a convention called SuperMegaFest, a quest that began over five years ago (see below) concluded when I met and got a photograph with actor and humanitarian Adrian Paul, who most famously portrayed Duncan MacLeod of the Clan MacLeod - The Highlander. 

Note that Adrian is in his early 50's and I am in my mid-30's. Do either of us look it? Who's to say we are not Immortals? (Thankfully, neither of us got the idea to try to take the other's head.)

Thank you for the pic, Adrian!

September 11, 2007

A week ago my sister Chadie, who trains in kung fu at the USA Shaolin Temple in New York, let me know that Adrian Paul started training at her temple.

Adrian Paul. Duncan MacLeod. The star of Highlander.

When I was in high school, Highlander was my favorite show (besides The Simpsons). Before Battlestar Galactica, Lost, Angel, Buffy, and before I ever even watched an episode of Star Trek (man, those were the days...) there were the time-spanning adventures of the immortal Duncan MacLeod, the Highlander. Sean, Bishah and I were total fucking nerds for Highlander. Trenchcoats and ponytails nerds. I still remember the opening spiel that preceded the Queen song by heart:

He is Immortal.
Born in the highlands of Scotland 400 years ago, he is not alone.
There are others like him, some good, some evil.
For centuries he has battled the forces of darkness, with holy ground his only refuge.
He cannot die unless you take his head, and with it his power.
In the end, there can be only one.
May it be Duncan MacLeod, the Highlander. 

Christopher Lambert's Connor MacLeod and the first Highlander movie was my gateway to the oft-maligned but still kind of wonderful Highlander universe. "Connor MacLeod was my kinsman; I don't know who you are." But Adrian Paul's Duncan MacLeod was my hero.

Today, I received a strange DHL package from Chad containing a pamphlet for the USA Shaolin Temple. I didn't understand why she sent me this and almost tossed it in the trash until I glanced at the back: Adrian Paul's autograph. To me.

I'm a happy guy today. Seriously, I couldn't be more pleased to have Adrian's autograph. Thanks, Adrian, and thanks to my sister.

Justice League #12

Welp, they kissed. Mmmmmmuah. Kissy kissy. Superman and Wonder Woman sittin' in a tree. (It was actually on the roof of the Lincoln Memorial.)

So ends the first year of The New 52 Justice League, DC's best selling blockbuster book and a book I have been less than enamored with. But give Geoff Johns the credit for making #12 a particularly dense issue with a lot going on, considering how sparse many of the early issues were in plot and substance.

The hype for the issue is all about The Kiss, but this was actually the final chapter in "The Villain's Journey" in which David Graves, the author of the Justice League's book that made them the world's most popular superheroes for the last five years, went nuts and became a ghastly apparition. He claims he destroyed the Justice League by getting them to fight each other in public; apparently seeing Wonder Woman, Superman, and Green Lantern come to blows on every TV screen and monitor in the world was enough to get the world to turn on the League, or at least become real skeptical about them.

Like most things about this book, it's for the best if you don't think about anything too much.

Anyway, Graves seemingly killed Steve Trevor, the League's liaison to ARGUS, the New 52's version of SHIELD, and Wonder Woman's ex-boyfriend. Turns out, no, he's not dead, and look out Graves - he's got a gun! Graves had shown the League the ghosts of their dead loved ones (The Waynes for Batman, Ma and Pa Kent, Hal Jordan's dad, etc.) but Trevor's reappearance woke Wonder Woman and the League up. Batman, the master strategist (and apparently the League's leader, it's revealed later) comes up with a master strategy: Hey everyone, blast him! Green light, sonic white noise, heat vision, then Wonder Woman and Aquaman hitting him with swords and kicks and trident - down goes Graves! Down goes Graves! The evil spirits possessing Graves bail, leaving him a cancer-stricken, dying husk.

I'd also like to complain that Johns writes Wonder Woman karate fighting by yelling "YAH!" Like she's Alicia Silverstone's Batgirl or Miss Piggy. Come on, Geoff!

Later, in Belle Reve, Amanda Waller comes to Graves' cell and asks him to write a book about How to Destroy The Justice League. What the hell would he know about it? He totally failed to do it. But whatever. I guess he came the closest. We also learn that whatever residual ash that was kicked up during Darkseid's invasion of Metropolis five years ago infected Graves and his family, thus giving them fatal lethal incurable cancer.

At the Justice League Watchtower, surfacey simpleton dialogue between Batman, Flash, Cyborg, Aquaman and Green Lantern shows dissension within the mighty League. Aquaman wants to be leader, because he's KING OF ATLANTIS! Batman says fuck you, I'm the boss. Green Lantern then decides to quit. Something about he spends most of his time in outer space anyway, so whatever. Green Lantern bails.

Meanwhile, at the hospital, Wonder Woman visits Steve Trevor in a Very Special Moment where we find out Steve is an emotional hand grenade who blows up on Wonder Woman for dumping him and stuff. He's older than she is, more worldly, a professional soldier, she was like 18 when they met, totally naive and sheltered in an island full of only immortal women, and Steve freaks out on her like a high schooler dumped on prom night. He literally rolls over in bed and turns her back on her. Real mature.

What Diana needs is a real man. A real Superman. A real lonely Superman. Who happens to be right there when she's moping on top of the Lincoln Memorial. He tells her his name is Clark Kent and tells her how lonely he is, and that's all it takes to get to first base with an emotionally vulnerable Wonder Woman. All that was missing was the Queen song "One Year of Love" from Highlander to start playing during this scene.

And that's Year One, folks. There's a tease for next year involving Shazam, Pandora's Box, Superman beating up Batman, the Cheetah, and the rise of the Justice League of America.

Also, in Justice League International Annual #1, Booster Gold from the future tells Booster Gold also from the future but the one we've been watching from the present something about how Superman and Wonder Woman together will doom us all. How? Well, you'll see.

Highlander: Endgame (**)

HIGHLANDER: ENDGAME

Though a terrible movie by objective standards, Highlander: Endgame stands as the second best Highlander movie ever made. The cinematic coming out party of Adrian Paul, bringing TV's Highlander Duncan MacLeod to the big screen after 5 seasons, is typically sabotaged by a typically rotten script and a typically incompetent director. I like to think that if Highlander: Endgame had a better script and director, Paul could have had a breakthrough in the way the late Brandon Lee would have had from the first Crow movie. For Highlander fans, Endgame is a frustrating yet fun hodgepodge of items and characters from the series and the original movie. Dragon's head katanas? Check. JVC sign (standing in for Silvercup) on the rooftop? Check. Bonnie Heather in flashback? Check. Joe Dawson and Methos? Check. "Bonnie Podmore" playing at the end? Check. Sex scene with the girl riding MacLeod cowgirl? Oh yes, check. Kell, the villain, was yet another over-the-top Kurgan proxy played by Bruce Payne. The cameo from 'special guest star Edge' of the WWF totally reeked of awesomeness; he SO stole the movie in the most important scene. Visibly long in the tooth as he was, it was still a joy to see Christopher Lambert portray the supposedly-eternally 35 year old Connor MacLeod one final time. Sadly, Endgame rendered the once mighty Connor as an inert has-been counting the minutes to his own death. Connor and Duncan MacLeod share several extended sequences, including their final sword fight that ends with the immortal line, "I love you, Connor." Aw. Duncan was speaking for the fans as well. Right back at you, Highlander.