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Tuesday, October 16, 2012

We Are Suh-Smart! We Are Suh-Smart!

Last night, my friends Lance, Jeff, Katie and I competed in The Simpsons Trivia. We played against 8 or 9 other teams under the team name No Footlongs. There was only one outcome: We're The Simpsons Trivia Champions of the World! (Or of the bar in Boston we were at.)

The last 22 years of watching and absorbing The Simpsons really paid off. We beat their brains in. We were in first place at every scoring cycle and won with a 5 point lead. No Footlongs (they make Ned Flanders uncomfortable) won a grand prize of $143, which paid for dinner and left us each with a cool six dollars. Only first place won anything, which was us. When the second place team asked the judge if they get anything, Lance told them to kiss his ass. Class.

There were some questions that seemed obvious that we blew. One was name the 5 characters not named Simpson who have been in the most episodes. We got Moe, Milhouse, Skinner, Burns, but we forgot Flanders. Stupid Flanders! We said Krusty. Each name was worth a point that we tripled with a bonus in that round.  

The three movies in the Springfield Film Festival: A Burns For All Seasons, Pukahontas, but we forgot Man Getting Hit By Football. We called it Football in the Groin. 

We made little mistakes here and there, but we also dominated things like the audio round of which countries the Simpsons have been to and the visual round matching movies the show has parodied. Got all of those no sweat. The round of real or fake Rainier Wolfcastle films was relatively easy to figure out: the fake ones were the ones that weren't funny.

Nobody got Snake's real name. But we knew every character played by Hank Azaria. Lance really came through with some tough ones: He got a Treehouse of Horror couch gag with Freddy and Jason, and he somehow knew the name of the gay steel mill Homer took Bart to (Anvil) in the John Waters episode.

I never had any doubt we would win this. If there was one thing I was born to do, it's win Simpsons Trivia. Katie and Lance initially doubted we'd win, but I'll put the staggering amount of minutia Jeff and I know combined against anyone's. And we did. Everyone pulled their weight. And we won.

We are suh-smart! We are suh-smart! S-M-R-T!